Ayesha said, "When news came of the deaths of Ibn Haritha, Jafar bin Abu Talib, and Abdullah bin Rawaha, may Allah be pleased with them, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ sat down with grief visible on his face. I was peeking through a crack in the door when a man came to him and said, 'Messenger of Allah, the women of Jafar's household,' and he mentioned their weeping. So he ordered him to forbid them.The man went away, then returned and said, 'I have forbidden them, but they did not obey me.'He ordered him a second time. The man went and came back and said, 'By Allah, they have overwhelmed us.'"She claimed that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ then said, "Throw dust in their mouths."Ayesha said, "I said to him, 'May Allah rub your nose in the dirt. By Allah, you are not going to do it, yet you have not stopped wearing out the Messenger of Allah.'"
لما جاء قتل ابن حارثة وجعفر بن أبي طالب وعبد الله بن رواحة- رضى الله عنهم- جلس رسول الله ﷺ يعرف فيه الحزن، قالت عائشة: وأنا أطلع من صائر الباب، تعني من شق الباب فأناه رجل، فقال: أي رسول الله إن نساء جعفر، قالت: وذكر بكاءهن، فأمره أن ينهاهن، قال: فذهب الرجل ثم أتى، فقال: قدنهيتهن وذكر أنهن لم يطعنه، قال: فأمر أيضا، فذهب ثم أتى فقال: والله لقد غلبننا. فزعمت أن رسول الله ﷺ قال: فاحت في أفواههن من التراب قالت عائشة: فقلت: أرغم الله أنفك، فوالله ما أنت تفعل، وماتركت رسول الله من العناء.
Bukhari narrated it in the Book of Battles (4263) and Muslim in the Book of Funerals (30:935), both through the route of Abdul-Wahhab, who said, I heard Yahya bin Saeed say, Amrah told me that she heard Ayesha say, and then he mentioned it.His saying, "Then throw dust in their mouths," is a figure of speech expressing the utmost degree of rebuke, since he was not actually able to carry it out. This is why Ayesha said, "May Allah disgrace your face, for by Allah you are not doing that," meaning that he was incapable of carrying out the disapproval he had been commanded to make, but he had put the Messenger of Allah ﷺ in an awkward position through how often he kept repeating it to him.