Abdullah bin Ubaydullah bin Abu Mulayka reported,

A daughter of Uthman passed away in Mecca, and we came to attend her funeral. Ibn Umar and Ibn Abbas were both present, and I was sitting between them. Or he said, I sat next to one of them, then the other came and sat beside me.Abdullah bin Umar said to Amr bin Uthman, "Why do you not forbid the weeping? For the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, 'The deceased is tormented by the weeping of his family over him.'"Ibn Abbas responded, "Umar used to say something of that sort." Then he related the following.He said, I traveled back from Mecca with Umar until, when we reached al-Bayda, he saw a group of riders resting under the shade of an acacia tree. He said, "Go and see who these riders are."I looked and found that it was Suhayb, so I informed him. He said, "Call him to me."I went back to Suhayb and said, "Set off and join the Commander of the Faithful."Later, when Umar was struck down, Suhayb came in weeping, saying, "Alas, my brother! Alas, my companion!"Umar ﷺ said, "Suhayb, are you weeping for me, when the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, 'The deceased is tormented by some of the weeping of his family over him'?"Ibn Abbas continued, When Umar died, I mentioned this to Ayesha, and she said, "May Allah have mercy on Umar. By Allah, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ never said that Allah torments the believer because of his family's weeping over him. Rather, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, 'Allah increases the punishment of the disbeliever because of his family's weeping over him.'"She added, "The Quran is sufficient for you, 'No bearer of burdens shall bear the burden of another' [Anam 6:164]."At that, Ibn Abbas said, "By Allah, 'It is He who makes one laugh and weep' [Najm 53:43]."Ibn Mulaykah said, By Allah, Ibn Umar said nothing in reply.

عن عبد الله بن عبيد الله بن أبي مليكة قال

توفيت ابنة لعثمان بمكة وجئنا لنشهدها، وحضرها ابن عمر وابن عباس رضي الله عنهما، وإني لجالس بينهما- أو قال: جلست إلى أحدهما، ثم جاء الآخر فجلس إلى جنبي- فقال عبد الله بن عمر رضي الله عنهما لعمرو بن عثمان: ألا تنهى عن البكاء؟ فإن رسول الله ﷺ قال: إن الميت ليعذب ببكاء أهله عليه. فقال ابن عباس: قد كان عمر يقول بعض ذلك، ثم حدث قال: صدرت مع عمر من مكة، حتى إذا كنا بالبيداء إذا هو بركب تحت ظل سمرة، فقال: اذهب فانظر من هؤلاء الركب. قال: فنظرت فإذا صهيب، فأخبرته، فقال: ادعه لي، فرجعت إلى صهيب فقلت: ارتحل فالحق بأمير المؤمنين. فلما أصيب عمر دخل صهيب يبكي يقول: وا أخاه وا صاحباه. فقال عمر ﷺ: يا صهيب أتبكي علي وقد قال رسول الله ﷺ: إن الميت يعذب ببعض بكاء أهله عليه. قال ابن عباس: فلما مات عمر ذكرت ذلك لعائشة فقالت: رحم الله عمر، والله ما حدث رسول الله ﷺ أن الله ليعذب المؤمن ببكاء أهله عليه، ولكن رسول الله ﷺ قال: إن الله ليزيد الكافر عذابا ببكاء أهله عليه، وقالت: حسبكم القرآن {ولا تزر وازرة وزر أخرى} [الأنعام: ١٦٤] قال ابن عباس عند ذلك: والله {هو أضحك وأبكى} [النجم: ٤٣] قال ابن مليكة: والله ما قال ابن عمر شيئا.